Day 1: {Writer Girl} The Readiness to Open Up

"While we might be more than willing to accept teaching on an

academic or professional level, when it comes to the way we are as

individuals, how we think and act, we don't like being told that there is

anything wrong with our mind set or behavior."

-The Monks of New Skete: In the Spirit of Happiness

I love to delve deeper into who I am, I love the journey of introspection. But on my own time. It takes a certain shift in perspective, a readiness and openness to receive life lessons and learn about our darkness and light. It also requires that we be gentle with ourselves, lighter and not so serious about who we are. If was are hard on ourselves and hard on the darkness that inhibits within, we cannot embrace it and live with ourselves.

Last January was a time in my life when the darkness within literally took over. I was feeling such a dip in my state of being, I wanted space, I couldn't connect with my little baby girl (who was then 1 and a half years), I was angry, aggressive with her needs, with my needs and I couldn't wake up with a smile. I was so angry at myself for being hard on my toddler, for being hard on people who were trying to help me. I just wanted to get away and sit in silence but the noise within just wouldn't allow any quiet. It was a hard time and a lot of things were going on in my life then that I just did not want to acknowledge. I was so hard on myself during this dark place in my life, that try what may, I couldn't get out of it.

Then something changed, I began to see that I didnt have to be so hard on myself, that I could just breathe and allow others to take care of me. That I could ease the noises in my head by giving myself a break. By giving myself the permission to feel the darkness, to let it be and change my circumstance, because the choice was mine. Slowly the notions of "should's" came away, I didn't need to be so serious about my walls, about who I am. I began to relax in the discomfort, I came undone and found myself.

________________________

"Writer Girl: 42 Days of Exercises to Deepen Your Faith in Your Ability and Your Purpose for Writing" by Robin Norgren  is a wonderful book to begin to trust in my ability to write and to uncover my purpose for writing. I am going to do this. Yes, For 42 days. 

Day 1: 100 words or 15 minutes. I chose 15 minutes and wrote for 25.

Like what you read? Subscribe to our newsletter